Welcome to those of you who popped over after reading my Proverbs 31 Encouragement for Today devotion. If you want to take a peek at it, click here.
We are in day two of our three-week online study of hospitality based on my book A Life That Says Welcome: Simple Ways to Open Your Heart & Home to Others. You are not too late to join. Click here for details.
WOW!! What great interaction yesterday on what makes you feel welcomed. I LOVED reading the comments! And, I can’t wait until Friday when you get a chance to share (through a link up if you have a blog or a comment if you don’t) your best company recipes! Get your aprons on!
Now, for today’s topic.
In the book, I talk about how I became convicted that I would spend loads of time and effort on outside guests while feeding my own family leftovers or peanut butter and jelly. It is easy to pull out all the stops for company and never put effort into our own kin, especially our husbands.
Our hubbies would like some pampering and good food once in a while too. And they’d also like some good….well, you know! “Horizontal fellowship” :-)
Today’s guest is here to share about putting our hubby’s first. I love the clever name of her blog. And, she’s just written a book on marriage too and the all-important physical part of it our dear hubbies so enjoy :-)
Welcome my friend Sheila!
From Sheila’s heart:
To be truly hospitable is not just to be cordial and generous. It’s also to put people at ease, and that involves authenticity far more than it does the correct table setting or the perfect meal.
And we cannot be authentically generous with guests unless we are first generous with those we love most. Hospitality begins at home.
Does your husband feel as if he is the most important person in your life? Here are some ways to ensure he knows that he is precious to you:
~ Greet him first when you meet each other at the end of the day. Whether you’re arriving home from work or he is, let his embrace be your first, before the kids or before any others. Banish distractions from your day, think about what you love about your husband, and give him a big, welcoming kiss!
~ Express gratitude and admiration. When my husband and I were first married, I loved to say, “I love you”. Those were beautiful words to me, but they just made him more and more withdrawn. What he needed was for me to tell him why I loved him. He needed to feel that I appreciated him and noticed the things he did. So I started saying, “Honey, you are such a great dad with the way that you read to Rebecca last night.”
~ Build him up with words when others can hear. Brag about your husband to your friends and family. Don’t let criticism towards your husband come out of your mouth in everyday conversation. What you say often determines what you think; say the positive, especially when he’s in earshot.
~ Step outside your comfort zone with hobbies. Many women despair that they never have time with their husbands, but men tend to communicate more side by side, when doing things together, rather than face to face, when sitting down talking. So do things he enjoys, rather than waiting for him to sit down and talk with you. Go fishing, go to a hockey game, take up jogging, and you’ll find that you laugh together more, have fun with each other more, and communicate more.
~ Draw boundaries. Make sure that you always have couple time, even once kids come. Keep your bedroom to yourself. Keep bedtimes for children consistent. Snatch time during the day to rejuvenate yourself, so that you prioritize couple time at night.
~ Finally, initiate sex. Yep! I don’t think most women realize how much a man’s sense of worth is tied up in whether or not his wife desires him sexually. It’s not just about sexual release; it’s also about a deep intimacy that men (and women) experience when we make love.
When we throw ourselves into it, we say to him, “I love you. I desire you. I want to share everything with you.” And making love is one of the main vehicles that God created for us to express this.
If you have issues in this area, that’s okay. God can help you through them! But don’t give up. Believe that sex is a wonderful thing, believe that it can—and will—be wonderful, and throw yourself into this beautiful part of your relationship.
Now for the day’s giveaways:
One commenter will receive a signed copy of my book A Life That Says Welcome. Another will get a copy of Sheila’s book The Good Girls’ Guide to Great Sex.
(I’ll bet I can guess which one your husband hopes you win!)
Okay, to be entered, leave us a comment with a way you can make a husband feel welcomed, wanted and honored in the home. (But leave the racy ideas to private conversations with your friends, ok? My kids read my blog! :-))
Remember, all winners will be announced the day after Easter and you may comment on all posts up until then to be entered in the random drawings.
So, how do you pamper your hubby?
NOTE: Remember we are also interacting over at Karen Ehman’s Book Studies on Facebook. Click here to “like” the page & join us. Starting this weekend there will be giveaways there too based on info from the book!