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Welcome to those of you who found your way here after reading my Proverbs 31 devotion tody. If you haven’t read it click here to do so and catch up with the rest of us. 
Today, let’s chat.
Do you struggle with contentment? With keeping up with the Joneses?
Is this something new or have you done this since high school?
Do you think social media like Facebook and Twitter and Pinterest make this harder when you see what others are doing, buying, making or thinking?
Have you ever had to go on a media fast to realign your contentment?
Any tips for gaining contentment that you’ve learned along the way?
How about any guidelines you put in place for your online viewing habits?
What do you think of this statement: discontentment comes from counting someone else’s blessings instead of your own?
Leave your thoughts and questions in the comments section. We’ll tackle this topic together today.
Also, one person will be chosen to win this giveaway.
It includes:
~ A copy of LET. IT. GO. (signed to increase the worth at your garage sale someday!)
~ A pink and brown softcover, compact, but large print Bible in the Holman Christian Standard version.
~ A bright, funky journal–you can use it to count your blessings.
~ An index card binder system, to use to record and memorize verses to help you keep your perspective.
~ A bag of cinnamon coffee–just for fun!
Okay—let’s chat. What are your answers to any of the questions above or any other thoughts you have?
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NOTE: the winner of the free conference call on how to write a bang-up book proposal is: CassandraS Send your email address to kim@proverbs31.org so we can get you signed up for the call. If any of the rest of you who did not win want to sign up for the call, the information is found here.
I think I could do with a media fast sometimes. When
You see all the things people are doing with all their
Friends on social media you can feel sorry for
yourself.
Contentment is a daily struggle especially with FB and Pinterest. You are bombarded with what the “other mom” is doing. Not only are we making our worth according to the world’s standards, but you are failing to see ourselves how God created us. I once heard contentment is a choice that you make with God on your side. So well put!
It
Oh Karen you definitely were peeking into my earlier life when you wrote this book. You and I could be twins –
I have had an issue with contentment since I was a little girl – THAT is a whole other story!!! It’s just within the last two years that I have let that go and started looking to God for my contentment. I slip every now and again but I have a great friend who snaps me back to reality in a no nonsense matter – which is just what I NEED!!!!
Looking forward to diving into the book.
God was speaking. straight. to. me. this morning as I was reading my daily Proverbs 31 devotional. This topic is something I’ve been struggling with the last few weeks, without even consciously realizing it was a struggle. Thank you for your wise words! I will begin to pray to that I stop coveting for other’s blessings.
As a single parent this is a constant struggle. You find yourself thinking life would be easier “if” there was a husband, more more money, etc.this came in perfect time cause my prayer has been to help me let go of the “ifs” & focus on my “haves”. I am excited to tackle this topic. Thank you.
Do you struggle with contentment? Oh my Yes!!! ~ that felt 100% better to get it out to admit it! I don’t try to keep up with the Joneses, but lately I have not been satisfied with myself or maybe even since high school (who knows) but I do now God has shown me that light. So look forward to this study and taking the steps to Letting it go, Trusting 100% in God and being satisfied with ME, with my life ~
I think Facebook, Pinterest, etc…..can sometimes become that source that we try to put blame on when it comes to our contentment, because we see what others are doing that we are not, we see things we want that we do not have and then there it is we are not satisfied until we have that or we do that or even possible do that better. I think time control on both are the key to try to contain that un-satisfaction we feel!
Okay I will stop now, obviously I could go on and on forever on this subject.
I struggle with contentment alot, I’m ashamed to say. It is so easy to feel jealous when I see all the wonderful and grand things my FB friends are doing or how well their children are doing in school. It’s easy to compare my family to our neighbors who seem to have “more”. Thankyou for this devotion, it eases my guilt just a little!
Contentment is something to really spend time pondering! I am finally an empty nester whose daughter has returned home and lives that very discontentment in her search for a career. I hve decided I need to role modelmy own content in my life, work, career! It is true that I can be content in exactly where I am today in all my life and will work to appreciate all that I do have an my lovely family!
Honestly, I am a “jones” and therefore keeping up with me is easy.
Just kidding— really the way I try to keep from being jealous to “counting gifts”. I was SUPER CHALLENGED by 1000 gifts. And it’s ha been something I have been intentional about. Looking for ask the ways God blessings our family!!!
Oh, you delivered the devotion I soooo needed today….. It is so easy to look around at my home that could use a little updating, my car which could use a little upgrading, my clothing which could use a little up-something-or-other, and just about everything else – when I compare to my neighbor or the Mom running carpool in front of me! All I really need to do is uplifting my head and focusing on the Father who is smiling down on messy me! Thank you again! God bless you!
Amen!
I have struggled with discontentment for many years….even prior to high school. My parents were divorced at an early age so I was always looking at two parent families and wanting what they had. Now I find myself in the same situation, divorced, with two kids. This devotion this morning really spoke to me and brought to light the depth of my discontentment. I want to model contentment in all my circumstances for my children. Thank you for sharing!
I am reminded again that it’s not about keeping up with the Joneses, but instead, keeping it real. Who cares about how nicely dressed your kids are for church Sunday morning, if they are on the honor roll at school, or what you cooked up for dinner. Our heavenly father looks at the heart and our motives behind what we do…are we pointing others to ourselves or HIM? Contentment for me comes from knowing that all I have is a grace-filled blessing from God and I should be thankful! Blessings Karen!
There is often a struggle with contentment in my life and I have to take time to remember how much I have been given and ask God to help me correct my attitudes. I often have to consciously replace the feelings of discontentment with gratitude. Thanks for helping me with that.
yes. this is the fight of my life right now. i am not married and because of my weight (i am underweight) i always felt like i would never get married and had to overcompensate for what i lacked. I think pinterest if you are not content with your life is really the devil. somethings you shouldnt have because they are neither good for you or helpful and the truth is th more you SEE the harder it is, you never know what’s BEHIND what you simply SEE, and sometimes its better to not see it as to not stir it up. I may never get married and until i am really content and accepting of this TRUTH, i dont like it when people rub it in. It is a stumbling block to me but it really comes from a heart that’s not content with what God has allowed and my portion. Perhaps my portion is to never get married, there’s little i can do about it. So I better be happy, still when i see what others are blessed with new home, family, kids yeah it gets my goat. I wonder what other christians around the world feel like when they see American Christians living high on the hog but they must suffer for their faith, it could make you want to give up altogether, i think its wonderful to be happy with what God has blessed you with but i dont flaunt it to those who have a difficult time, but we never know the sacrifices that were made for others to get what they have. But this is truly the battle of my life right now. I wish i could be content if God chooses never to bless me with what i see.
I struggle with contentment badly.. I am always fighting the inner voices that tell me that I’m not good enough, smart enough, pretty enough… Add being a single Mom for the last 11 years, waiting on Gods best for me doesn’t make it easier..
I struggle with contentment daily. I have a wonderful husband, great kids, and terrific friends, but still feel like something is missing. I rarely think to turn to the One who can help me settle those thoughts and quiet my yearnings. I loved your post today and Proverbs 31 devotion. I am going to consciously think today of all I have to be grateful for
I try to be pretty content. There are times I wish we could do those awesome family vacations you see.
But over all I am learning to be content at Jesus’ feet. I would love to win the set to share
with my sister in law.
My family struggles with contentment. “This girl has that” or “Why can we not have____?” Social media as it is, seems to be a place to brag and show off to others what you have or plan on having. Not everyone has the same lives, likes, family, or enjoys the same activities. So why do we feel the need to “keep up” with someone or something that we are not.
I do believe social media can cause discontentment. I do limit my time. I am thankful that I have grown to put my trust in God. That has been a process of life trails, studying
God’s word and prayer.
I am good at teaching my children about contentment, yet still struggle a little bit with it myself. I have cancelled my facebook account primarily because it was a huge time-waster for me,but there were times early on when I would see what others were doing and have a tinge of jealousy. I do know that the Joneses are not what they are cracked up to be, and need to remind myself constantly by staying in God’s word and in prayer. When something good happens to someone I know, I purposely tell them how happy I am for them, even if sometimes I wonder “Why not me?”. Just saying the words helps to put my heart in the right place. Ultimately time with God shows me that I am just where I need to be. It has taken me around ten years to come to this place of peace and still need to die daily to my flesh. We are all so ridiculously blessed in this country; the Lord always puts a story or news article in my path so help me put my wants in perspective. Thanks for your faithfulness and for this post.
I guess I’d say I learned early in life, when my twin sister died at the age of 5 what is important in life and how to be content. I think it’s sad and comical that people base their contentment on what they see on social media. How do you know what’s being posted is true? The majority of the people “you” might be following aren’t in the same town to get a true picture anyway. I have found that it doesn’t matter how much or how little you have, until you fill that spot in your heart that can only be filled with Jesus you will never find contentment.
This is exactly what I need to hear in this season of my life. For 4 years we have been struggling to grow our family and I have many moments where I need to be reminded to focus on G-d instead of my circumstances. Financially we are living on 1/3 of what we were 2 years ago. Although I do love my life now as much as I did when our income was higher, I have my moments of frustration when I see people who lie and be manipulative have things we hope to have for our own family. And when I start down that road it snowball into me focusing on all of the things that don’t seem to be going the way I had hoped or planned and that is a dangerous place to be. The tips that I use most when I get stuck in that.uncomfortable place is to lean on the scripture 2Cor 10:5 “…We take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ” (NIV) Also I find that listening to praise music helps me refocus. I’m thinking that this bible study will touch on things I have tried to avoid addressing. I guess that means its time to start it!
I think your statement about counting other’s blessings and not your own is right on target. We often focus on how blessed someone else is and all we know is what we superficially see. We have no idea what is going on behind the scenes. The devil uses envy to drag us into the pit. If we would just pause and develop an attitude of gratitude and begin to think about how blessed we are, we can redirect our thought process and mindset. Love to read your book!
Wow!! Contentment has always been my weakness. I struggle when I see the wife that has the “perfect” husband. (knowing there is no such thing) But he dotes on her and is the sweetest thing to her. Another struggle is when I receive a call from the principal, once again, to tell me what my hyper 15 year old has done today. Honestly, I believe she has my number on speed dial. I see all of the other calm, 15 year old boys that don’t act like mine and appear to be angels for their parents. Oh how I envy those parents at times. I long to find contentment in all my circumstances. I do believe social media adds fuel to the fire. It does allow jealousy to creep into those tiny crevices in my heart when I see or hear about what “so and so’s son” did today or what a wonderful, sweet gesture “so and so’s husband” did for her today. Sometimes, I just have to step away from the computer and focus on the positive attributes that my son and husband do have and stop comparing to “so and so’s husband or son”. After all, my husband brought some socks to me on Sunday afternoon while I was lounging in my chair because he thought my feet might be cold. (I didn’t even have to ask, now that was sweet). Lord, help me to be content in all circumstances and focus on the blessings I do have rather than looking elsewhere for contentment.
I would love to receive the LET.IT.GO giveaway. I am such a control freak and would love to learn how to increase my faith in God and to be able to LET.IT.GO. Thanks so much for your encouraging words.
I have been told ” you are never satisfied” for all of my life. Contentment is something that I never seem to have had in my life. Looking forward to your bible study!
**What do you think of this statement: discontentment comes from counting someone else’s blessings instead of your own?
i think the statement above is probably pretty true to form…when I focus on others instead of what the Lord has given me, i tend to become discontent. I’d love to be included for your giveaway.
I completely agree with the statement that discontentment comes from counting someone’s blessings other than your own. It’s extremely easy in the age of social media to see everyone else’s blessings and then allow jealousy to creep in to your thoughts. Reminding myself to count my own blessings is a daily battle, and that battle begins each day by focusing my thoughts in the right direction…towards the Word, where I am reminded of the many awesome characteristics of God.
Great topic for Monday! I can lose my contentment if I take my eyes off Jesus. Sometimes words from that old song pop into my mind, ” turn your eyes upon Jesus. Look full in His wonderful face. And the things of earth will grow strongly dim, in the light of His glory and grace .” Social media, yes it can make you compare your self to others. I have tried to have the honestly and boldness to post things that can be helpful rather than just become an all about how well I am doing. But it can creep up on you. Sometimes when you are brave enough to be honest, others just relate to that so well and you find blessing in sharing .
I just try to focus on the idea that this is all stuff on loan anyway…
I’ve felt discontent for a while now. I have much to be thankful for, yet I always seem to have a “but …”. Paul says he LEARNED to be content. That’s what I’m trying to work on. Taking those “but” thoughts captive and focusing on all the ways God blesses me. Some days I do better than others. Some days not so much!
I love that thought on discontentment coming from counting someone else’s blessing instead of your own . I will try to focus on that & share it with my teenagers ????
I have struggled with contentment. It started in highschool…i was the only girl out of my group of friends that never had a boyfriend..looking back now…its totally fine cause God saved me from a LOT of heart ache…but back then it hurt something awful!
My husband and I will be married for 13 years this summer and we’ve never owned our own house..I struggle with that off and on. I just have to realize that I have so much more in Christ then the material things and I am so thankful for all that he has blessed me with.
I struggle with contentment and have for many years. Not necessarily in “things” but just with life in general. I have already read LIG once all the way through, but am doing the OBS with Melissa Taylor and I am really looking forward to reading it again and really getting deep in it. My discontentment has always been with life in general…always having to struggle when i was a single mom, things never seeming to “work out” for me like they did for other people. I see improvement and have for the last couple of years, but I realize it is a constant struggle and I am hoping this book will show me some way to change. Thank you and God bless
That is me! I see my friends always catching breaks, meeting goals, having things go right and I’m like “WHAT ABOUT ME?? IM TRYING SO HARD BUT I AM LIMITED!” I can’t afford to go out like a single person, or leave my daughter with a sitter to get a second job…
Thanks for sharing your comment and lettin me know that it’s not just me. Lol
A wonderful post, thank you. I don’t use any of the ‘social media sites’, but it isnt always easy not to compare, not with others but with what one once had. We have downsized recently and I’m still in the throes of making it work.
But I do know that in all things there is a reason and that God will support me through the occasional longings!
The key to contentment is keeping things in perspective. When you think about the unfortunate circumstances people are in all around you, you suddenly realize you are content with what you have and where you are in life.
I do find that social media increases the temptation to focus on what is going right in other peoples’ lives, which sometimes increases discontent! Counting my own blessings and focusing on what God trying to teach me in each situation really helps !
I think my discontent usually plays out in my “WHY ME?” attitude. I’m a single mom, going through what is not going to be a nice divorce, and last night a friend mentioned she had been having a hard time and just decided to go on a cruise with a friend. Just like that. Leaves kids with hubby and off she’ll be to the Bahamas in two weeks. And she’ll just “work and extra shift” to pay for it.
Her cruise costs as much as my part-time biweekly paycheck.
And while I was feeling sorry for myself, I was reminded that in my depressed financial state, I’ve been put into a position to aid the food ministry at my work, which I never would have been interested in were my income the level it was before my husband left.
So He has me where He needs me.
And I should be more than content with that. I should be singing praises that He is revealing to me a way to help His people.
And I am…but that doesn’t mean I don’t still wish I could go on a cruise whenever I felt like it!
Please pray for me! I want to be content!! It’s one reason I have up social media: no twitter, no Facebook, no Pinterest, no Instagram….I can’t be content when I constantly compare.
Every time I feel discontent, I think of those who has less things than me. I have turned away all magazines. Mom used to pass on her magazines to me, and I have told her not to do it anymore. That they do not benefit me. It only stress me out with this is bad or this is good. What was good last month is bad this month. Forget it. I do not need stress!
Wow awesome post ,
I love your study Karen
I have struggled with contentment a lot of my life and social media is just adding to that so really need to take a break from social media I have been unemployed for 2/12 months and being single it is really a hard road , and then when you think you have people that encourage. It’s all about what they have been thru. So I have always struggle to fit in and keep up with everyone else so not happening
Sometimes the jealousy. Issue on FB is to much .
Hope to LET. IT. GO
As a military wife in a life that can often be incredibly challenging, I find it all too easy to find myself thinking how nice it must be for those wives whose husbands work decent hours, have weekends, and don’t leave for months to a year at a time. How not having to learn and relearn how to be a family every other year is such a blessing and on and on and on. This negativity can really become a crippling, (solely self-pitying) mantra socially and spiritually. I have struggled with contentment not just in this area, but in a lot of other areas as well- as I’ve suddenly realized. Today’s Proverbs 31 devotional spoke to my heart in a much needed moment of truth. Sometimes I really can’t see the forest for the trees. Time to change my glasses. Thank you!
My discontentment I think really started after I had kids. I look at other moms who seem to have it all together. Their kids have lots of things and clothes. They go out to eat, on vacations and do lots of activities. I have learned that most moms struggle like me, and those that have a the material things are in debit. They are also on the go and unhappy to never be home. God is helping me to see his plan in the quiet, less cluttered way of life for our family.
I love your honesty!
I love your message below. I haven’t ever truly stopped to think about this before. Thank you.
“To truly embrace our circumstances, we must decide to stop pleading, “God, get me out of here!” and learn to humbly ask instead, “Lord, why have You brought me here? What are You trying to reveal to me that I would never discover if You were to suddenly pluck me out of this situation? What godly character qualities are You trying to grow in me? Patience? Trust? Faith? Compassion?”
I struggle with presenting an IMAGE of contentment. I am a people pleaser through and through. As a kid I quickly realized that my family didn’t HAVE as much as most families. I also realized that this made my parents feel really bad.
Bad because bills were overwhelming. Bad because they couldn’t afford to buy us brand new school clothes. Bad because they were never able to take us on “amazing” vacations.
Quickly I learned that a way to help ease my parents hurt was to people please and FAKE contentment. If there were two pairs of shoes at Payless, one for $15 and one on deep clearance for $5 – I suddenly fell in “love” with the $5 pair. When I opened a birthday gift and was disappointed by what I received I cranked up the smiles and cheers that much more. And when my parents didn’t have enough money to help me buy the team sweatshirt for soccer – I acted like I didn’t even really want one.
I’ve carried this through to adulthood. I find myself not necessarily wanting what others have but I deeply covet their spirit of contentment. I’m not jealous of other womens clothes or jewelry or vacations, but I am deeply jealous of their outward appearance of self-assurance and fullness.
I know that the RIGHT thing to do is to BE content so I ACT content. My struggle is reminding myself that ACTING is not BEING. ACTING is what I do when I know the answer, but I want to take a shortcut to the solution.
Wow! This is HUGE! I could have written this myself! I’ve learned that the more I try to “look” like I have it all together, the more I struggle with bitterness. I would much rather be who I am all the time (even if I’m far from perfect) than to look great and be miserable. Thanks for reminding me that I’m not alone in this struggle!
yeah i do this is the fake marytr syndrome, Lord I m not able to be married, that’s alright i didnt want it anyway, or oh they have a baby, oh well im not good with kids anyway so i dont need what they got. i start lying to myself when the truth is i want it but am afriad to acknowledge the truth, but you cant get to tru contentment till you tell God the truth and then act content, i think contentment is a choice. Trusting God if He wanted something for me I’d have it. But you must be honest with God
You ladies are so awesome!!! I’m praying for you as we go through this journey to get real and stop faking contentment!
Good morning Karen! Thank you so much for this post. Contentment has been a persistent problem for me as I have tried to live up to others’ expectations instead of focusing on what God is doing in my life. I love the statement that discontent is counting someone else’s blessings instead of mine. The Holy Spirit has had to remind me frequently of what He has done for me to help me realize that what I have, not what others have, is important.
I tend to compare myself in terms of physical attributes and then feel discontentment because I am not as pretty or as coordinated or as …. as whomever I am comparing myself too. I even compare myself to myself before I developed a major chronic illness. Most days I am thankful to God to be alive and ask Him to help me be a light to my family, church and community, but if I don’t stay grounded in the gospel, discontent creeps in. We have so much that we don’t deserve and its from a perfect, holy God who wants to be in relationship with us. Amazing!!!!
When I start looking at the lives of others, I try to remember something L. Terquest said and I will paraphrase: “When we constantly compare ourselves to others, we are missing out on the beautiful life God gave to us. We must remember that we are not equipped to handle the life he gave to others. For we often only see what we want from their lives and forget that if we were to have that life, it would include the baggage, too.” This perspective has helped me so much. I do admit though, I need to stay of FB more and not get caught up in the drama. The facade can look so nice but if the structure isn’t on a solid foundation, it will soon crumble. I am more thankful every day for the life God gave me. I may not always understand it or appreciate it, but I am learning to trust that His plan is perfect.
I think a media fast is an excellent idea! I do agree with you Karen, it wasn’s as bad when we were kids, it wasn’t so glaringly in our faces as it is now. I feel bad for my children, who constantly struggle with this, (not that I don’t, but I keep telling them “It’s only “stuff”"). I will work on this myself!!
For years I have tried to repeat to myself over and over… ‘I have learned to be content in plenty and in want’ Somedays I am very content, and on other days I cant’ help but think the grass is greener in other people’s lives. I just finished ‘Let it Go.’ It spoke to me in so many ways…..I have been blessed by God is so many ways…. now is the time to give up my discontenment and live life to the fullest, loving God, and working to bless others!
Contentment, comparing our finances with my friends is hard for me. They want to go shopping, out to eat, I can’t, so that bothers me sometimes.
I think a media fast would be a great idea. I’ve been pondering it for a while.
I do struggle with contentment – that I don’t have it “together” enough – that my home/life don’t run as smoothly as I’d like.
For me contentment becomes a problem when I care what others think. Or I think people are looking at me/my posessions and are judging me. So for me the key is to stop caring what people think. Easier said than done.
I tend to be pretty content in life – but do struggle when my family (i.e. kids!) express discontentment with what they don’t have. To me, I see so many blessings in our lives that it frustrates me when others don’t see things the same way, or simply forget them. And yes, social media and television advertising contribute to the feelings of discontentment – no doubt about it!
I have learned somewhat to be content with physical things (once in a while i still have to give myself a talking), but the area i really struggle is my marriage. My husband has struggled with an illness for over 20 years and is no longer able to work. Sometimes I just want to unload all the responsibility I carry, but I love the questions you ask the Lord in your devotional today and have begun to ask Him those questions for myself….what can i learn today? Thank you sooo much!
At age 45, I discovered I had ADHD. My son was diagnosed first–he didn’t just fall off the turnip truck. Most every human being alive out there today seems to have a pretty strong opinion about ADHD and what I should do for my son and what I should do personally. My home tends to be a mess and I struggle a lot with organization, but what people can’t see is just how hard the duck is paddling beneath the surface and how far I have come spiritually, emotionally and even organizationally than where I started. Christ has been incredibly gracious to me and I have to meditate upon His sufficiency all the time. I have times of despair when I play the comparison game and I ask God to remove the ADHD because I assume then my life would be altogether easier. But I have had to learn to be incredibly grateful for my life and to focus on what really matters –who God says I am in Christ. He understands how tough things are sometimes and unlike many people I’ve encountered, he doesn’t judge me. I don’t even look at things like Pinterest at all. It definitely helps to stay away from most social media. I loved Elisabeth Eliot’s line “The difference is Christ in me, not a different set of circumstances.” Having ADHD has forced me to reorient my priorities and let go of the nonsense.
Your visual of “how hard the duck is paddling beneath the surface” is FANTASTIC!!!! It made a lot of things really click for me just now.
I completely agree with all of these other ladies! I believe a media fast would be a wonderful thing but with my businesses that would be almost impossible! Since I have quit working outside the home and have devoted my mornings completely to my Bible study time I have been doing a lot better with this area of my life. The Lord really placed a strong conviction on my heart early on to let go of worry and I have truly done that. Along with that He told me that I would not truly be happy until I was content and that is my next journey. For a shop-a-holic that has been hard but believe it or not I’m doing it! And enjoying it! It is bringing me so much me peace and so much closer to my Lord and His word! I am so very excited about this Bible study of your book Let.It.Go and where it takes me on this next step of my journey!
This is definitely something I needed to hear today. I struggle with the issue of contentment often. I believe one of the keys is to simply focus on counting your own blessings and not looking at what others have. Someone once reminded me that we often only look at the blessings others experience – and don’t see the hidden hurts that they might be dealing with. Just have to keep it all in a heavenly perspective – definitely difficult with the media we are bombarded with! Thanks for sharing some encouragement today Karen!
Even though I want to be content and trust God, I still feel overwhelmed by worry. Day after day I try to live my life “One Day At A Time,” read my Bible, devotions, and listen to Christian radio but still struggle with comparing my circumstances to others (the Jones’) if you will and wonder if a relationship with Christ really matters because it looks like God’s Word isn’t working and I become anxious & depressed. Which is why I would love to win a copy of your book so I can “learn” like Paul how to “Let It Go” and experience the contentment that comes from trusting God.
I think as women we all struggle with discontentment at some point or another. With so much social media out there it really doesn’t help. On facebook we see how great everyones lives are. What great vacations they are going on, how smart their kids are, how great there husbands are. Then it makes us look at our own lives and desire what they have yet it is probably not as great as we think it is. Then you have pinterest. Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE that site but sometimes I feel like my home should be so much more and decorating my home becomes my daily focus. I think I definitely need a fast from social media and spend more time with the Lord so I can be content with what He has given me, which is quite a lot.
Being a pastor’s wife, I have learned to be content it most things. Even though I long to live close to my grown children and grandchildren, I go with my husband to where the Lord leads us to go and try to find things that are good about that place, mostly the people. When the media brings me down, I try to turn off what ever is on and begin mediating while working with a hands on project. It often helps. God bless you in your ministry!
I know that through God’s Presence guiding me through many difficult circumstances, never leaving my side, and always showing me His way, I have learned to be content in whatever circumstances I find myself. The key is keeping our eyes and heart and mind set on Jesus Christ, The Author and Finisher of my Faith! When ,y eyes, mind and heart slipped, then discontentment began to creep in……however God’s great forgiveness is beyond words and His healing and setting me back on His path is where my faith in Him has grown. Thank you for this opportunity to share……I do not have it all together by any means but I have an intimate relationship with the One who does…..that is all I need to live this life in Joy for life’s journey one moment at a time!
Thanks, Karen, for a great devotion this am! I really needed to hear the following “Lord, why have You brought me here? What are You trying to reveal to me that I would never discover if You were to suddenly pluck me out of this situation? What godly character qualities are You trying to grow in me? Patience? Trust? Faith? Compassion?”
I have had to reduce social media usage (as well as ‘mom blogs’) as I find it is a tool the devil uses to ‘steal my joy.’ Most people only share the best things going on in their lives and it is easy to think that all of their lives are perfect…be it in parenting, financial status, marriage, walk with God etc.
I have to admit that contentment is really something I don’t struggle with much. I’m not saying I ever do, but for the most part I find myself happy with what I have. Sometimes I am upset about all the troubles I have to go through, but I don’t find myself desiring more than what I have.
Great devotional!!!
I have gotten much better at this, not perfect yet, but better. I have found that those women who have beautiful , cute clothes, live in a beautiful home have lots of issues to deal with that I might not have…like a husband who drinks too much or kids that are out of control…No life is perfect…we would never learn anything if it was….and God wants us to learn to walk worthy of the calling he has purposed for us.. It is a daily decision…He loves us so much.
I think that is a struggle with for most and I wish it wasn’t . Staying off of facebook and social media helps for me. If I was a facebook regular, I think I would feel like I needed to make comments and “like” stuff so that it didn’t offend anyone, etc. It’s just too much pressure and that’s the last thing that moms need. We put enough pressure on ourselves without that stuff staring us in the face constantly. I have a hard enough time keeping my email inbox clean. I wouldn’t even know where to begin to keep up with it!! There’s enough “keeping up with the joneses” everywhere so we need to try to not let it invade our home too. God bless y’all as we are all in this together.
I believe social media is the main cause of discontent for most women today…I was MUCH happier and busier without the constant interaction, yet it’s like an addiction…so hard to NOT be connected…frustrating…
I think its a good thing countries are far away from each other what you see sparks lust never before have we had access to ppls lives how do those who live in a shack feel when they see will and kate if i didnt know God i might b tempted to think God definately loves them more than me. I think too much information is not such a good thing what if you cannot do what they do and God has not given you that you still have to b content with your lot
This one really grabbed my attention today. As a young mommy with a chronic condition that offers no cure, it is all too easy to be discontent when I see healthy moms being able to have busy schedules and all the normal things. However, I am trying my best to use fb as a prayer tool and a way to encourage rather than just constantly checking to see what everyone else is doing. I am involved with positive groups and resources to take the focus off the negative aspects!
I could have written what you wrote, Louise, except that I’ve been a mom for a while longer. I found myself deleting my first facebook account because I had “friended” too many people who didn’t share the same values I do and who used fb as a means of bragging or venting. After a while (a fb fast, if you will), I rejoined after much encouragement from our MOMSnext group (like MOPS, but for moms of school aged kids) and I’ve only “friended’ friends who use fb to encourage each other, to share devotions, Bible verses, etc….. I am so glad that I rejoined fb because I do find, as a stay at home mom, that I “need” social interaction….. but positive, uplifting interaction, not the kind that drags me down….
When I was a teenager, I became sick with envy whenever I saw a particular girl with her mother. They acted like sisters rather than mother-and-daughter, laughing, hugging, talking…the complete opposite of me and my mother. They dressed alike in expensive matching Jessica McClintock outfits. They were beautiful and glamorous and OH, how I wanted to be “them” instead of us!
Then I learned that the mother was regularly violating her marriage vows, and my entire perspective changed. What I had seen as perfect was nothing but a facade covering multiple lives of pain.
I still struggle with envy, but it’s usually short-lived. I don’t know the backstory; I only see what’s put out for public viewing. And as unglamorous as my day-to-day life probably seems to others, it’s just right for me!
wow. that’s telling, esp in lieu of Psalm 73 because the truth will never cause you to envy i believe only lies about the truth will lead you to envy, when i release im getting better then i deserve i better stick a fork in my hat and be happy.
I struggle with outward appearances, for sure! One of my focus verses for 2013 is from
1 Samuel 16:7 when God says that people look at the outside, but He looks at the inside.
“When we see others owning, enjoying, or experiencing what we do not have, but wish we did, it may make us discontent.” Such a good quote! I have a friend who said years ago..”compare to despair”..I’ve never forgotten that and find it true in my own life. When I look at what others are experiencing, I get discouraged sometimes. But when I regularly record my blessings in my “thankfulness” journal, I get to see God’s hand in so many different ways in my life. PS your verse for the devo today is one my daughter (10 yrs old) and I are memorizing.:)
I agree with Susie Daggett that viewing everyone’s best moments can make us feel that we have less. When I look at who God created me to be and the gifts I have I begin to see how blessed I really am. Still in the same circumstances as before but with a whole new perspective.
There are days when I still struggle with it. After almost losing our home this past year and struggling financially, I just try to stay focused on what God has blessed us with. We still have our home, we both have jobs, we are all healthy and happy. I also remember that God has a different plan for each one of us.
I has and will always be that I am not doing enough as a mom and wife that some how I am letting them more than I will ever know. I know silly right? I see what everyone else is doing how there lives are all together and I think what am I doing wrong? I am a Christian woman and my life doesn’t look like that, I hope that makes sense LOL
But then I realize that my life is great and I am right where God wants and needs me to be right now.
What gets me is just when I think I’ve got the stuff behind me, all forgiven like a neat tidy package, something happens, or is said, or whatever and it rears it’s ugly head and it’s like I have never dealt with the issue!!! The bad thing is I have been openly dealing with this for the better part of 40 years!!! It also affects my life in other areas, because of self-esteem issues. I want to Let It Go!!! Once And For All!!!
I guess where the “discontentment” comes in most for me is watching HGTV and all the shows for doing remodelling/renovating. I would SO love to re-do our kitchen, get new flooring throughout, and re-do our bathroom….other than painting, nothing much has been done inside our house since 1983 when we built it. As an almost 23 year old at the time, I didn’t know much about building a house and there are SO many things I’d do differently. Then I remind myself that so many people live in substandard conditions and they would LOVE to have what we have.
I loved your post this morning! I could definitely relate the questions you asked for the discussion. I have learned to be grateful for everything I have in life and do not worry about trying to stay caught up with the Joneses. That is considered a big world of competition to me and I would rather not deal with all that drama and negative escapade in my life. I recently did have to take a short break from media and go on a much needed fast to realign my contentment. I found I was spending way too much time on the social media sites and needed a serious refocus check. It helped me regroup myself and continue to focus on my real priorities in life rather than stay caught up in the web on online. Once the new year approached, I discovered I wanted to make a commitment to spend more time in God’s word this year and every year throughout the rest of my life. By making that commitment out loud, it was more meaningful to me and is to make me feel more accountable to stick with it. My relationship with the Lord is the utmost important thing in my life and so I feel He is worth the investment. When you are surrounded by the thoughts and sights of what others have and are doing in life, it is easy to get distracted and caught up in feeling less content in your own life.
I agree with being a single parent you can get caught up in the social media trap and be envious of what you “thought you deserved” in life rather than counting the many blessings that are right in front of you. Sometimes I do have to get off social media and regrouped and praise God for the many, many ways he has truly blessed me. He knows the path ahead of me I have to remember to follow. I try to remember it can always be dreamy on the surface, but what goes on behind closed doors is any bodies guess.
I absolutely think social media increases our desire to “keep up with the Joneses”.
I think of Romans 12:15: “Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those weep.”
We tend to think that weeping with those that weep is harder than rejoicing with those who rejoice. However, when we are hurting…say with a rebellious child, it is hard to read glowing reports about how well someone else’s child is doing. We need to speak that verse to our hearts and obey God’s command (it’s not a suggestion!). He will restore our joy and hope in His power to work His grace in our children as He does in others. Seeking to rejoice with others this day!
I have struggled with discontent in the past and after several years of always feeling like a failure or like I was never good enough or could have been better…..I finally gave it over to GOD completely. I now completely enjoy my life. I don’t have a big fancy home, but I have a home that we love….. we don’t have a huge savings account, but we have one….we don’t go on huge lavish vacations, but we do get to spend some awesome weekends together as a family doing the things we love most and have made some great memories…. I guess I don’t feel like I need to post all the things we do as a family or all the wonderful things my husband surprises me with or does for me…..I sometimes think individuals post things to make themselves appear to have that “perfect” life. Don’t get me wrong…I like reading and keeping up with my family and friends, but you need to make sure you don’t compare your life to others. GOD gave you your life and he gave other’s theirs. We need to stay focused on the life the good LORD gave us and treat it with the respect it deserves. I found that once I really started enjoying and embracing the life GOD gave me….I finally started living life and enjoying it. I would not trade my life for anyone else’s cause this is the one that GOD gave me!!!!!! I am super excited about this study and reading what others have to say.
Loved this blog so much that I clicked forward as soon as I was finished reading it. I’ve re-read it twice! I have been on a 3 month facebook hiatus, meaning I deactivated my account. I miss some things, yes, but what I don’t miss (and what I’ve realized so strongly) is the comparison mentality with social media circles. Even when it’s yourself doing it. You know, finances are continually a struggle so you highlight how sweet your kids are?! I struggle with comparison on so many levels. Whether it’s the Christian couple who gets to go out to eat weekly, have a date whenever they want (with Grandparents able and desiring to watch the kids), or decorating their big, perfect house. Or it’s the Christian mom who never seems to lose it, get really angry, or ever question God…. I compare all too often! This is why a 3 month hiatus from social media has been refreshing, real, and life-affirming! And I loved how you described it in your blog! Also loved Elisabeth Elliot’s quote, “The difference is Christ in me. Not me in a different set of circumstances.” I hope I can live to fully claim that also, that is my prayer! Thanks for sharing your gift, Karen!
I struggle daily with my own contentment within my family. We are going through a tough time regarding past mistakes and working through them. But it is killing me and my kids trying to walk through stuff that doesn’t matter to move forward. In high school I did want to fit in and others to like me. I see that in my oldest son and I want for him to know how special he is in GOD’s eyes and doesn’t have to win the approval of others.
This was EXACTLY what I needed to read. Thank you! I have been wondering if I’ve been alone in feeling discontent, but after reading the devotion and all the posts, I am amazed at how many women struggle with the same issue. I bet even the Joneses struggle with discontentment!
I think the biggest lie that entangles me is when I think that everyone seems to have it together more than I do. But one thing I do that my husband actually told me is to remember that what we see on facebook and other media is ONE side of the picture. So I tell myself this constantly when I feel those negative thoughts creeping in. The person who posts something on facebook about how great things are going in one part of her life may be having an immense struggle in another part of her life. We all have struggles and it helps me to remind myself that we don’t see the full picture. Just imagine how facebook would be transformed if people only posted their prayer requests. We would stop thinking about ourselves and start praying for everyone’s needs. Facebook would become a place of support instead of a place where we just feel worse about ourselves every time we read a post. I think I grieve God when I start wishing I had things differently – whether it be in the way I look or my abilities to manage the household. When I wish that things were different, I am in some ways telling God that I’m not thankful and I don’t appreciate the way He has created me. When I think of it this way, I realize how sad I am about making God sad! Discontentment is still a constant battle for me. I do have to be careful about spending too much time on facebook and it’s SO important to arm myself with the Word of God. If I don’t, it’s easy to slip into negative thoughts. Only Jesus can help me overcome these feelings of insecurity! Ladies – you all are beautiful, wonderful and amazing. God designed you and made no mistakes. He is using our situations to make us better and draw us closer to Him!
Hello Everyone,
I used to battle contentment quite a lot a few years back and occasionally still do. Coming to church and submerging our family into missions put this all into perspective. We serve a hot breakfast to our homeless and under-resourced in our city every Saturday and Sunday. Seeing how they are having to make ends meet with the lowest possible means has truly shown all of our family how blessed we are. We also sort clothes for another ministry every Wednesday night. Looking at the amount of material items we all purchase and then let go of, especially women, has also proven that I need to live more simply. Thank you so much for your ministry! <3
Karen, I think this is my favorite P31 devotion ever – despite the fact that my last name is Jones!:) Your words were insightful and straight to the heart of what every woman struggles with. And the definition of contentment and Elizabeth Elliot’s quote? GOOD stuff. Thanks for using your gifts to bless other’s lives in a very real way.
I try overcome my discontentment (I don’t need Pinterest or social media to cause it) by counting my blessings and writing in my gratitude journal daily. The older I get the less materialistic I try to be. Don’t get me wrong, I love, love all the things the Jones’ have but how many “things” do I really need?
i constantly have to remind mysef that even though people don’t post about it, everyone has to clean toilets!
I have more contentment and I think it is a result of not having cable TV and not turning the TV on before 7 during the weekdays, I also have a facebook page but have not ever gotten into it, I deliberately have deleted all emails that require subsriptions to department stores etc. For finace reasons I don’t have email on my phone or an electronic pad at this time may have it in the future but I am more content as I submit to the season I am in. All things have a time and purpose learning that the hard way but more content.
yes, i struggle w/contentment…most often when I compare myself to others instead of focusing on how God has blessed me!
I love the idea of a media fast. It would give me more time to focus on my priorities and count my blessings, not compare myself with others.
Karen—God spoke to me through your devotional this morning. In the past three years, my husband lost a very well paying job that he loved, our daughter has a painful chronic illness which she started having to have multiple surgeries for and my beloved mother passed away. I keep waiting for God to give me my “old life” back. But that is not His plan. You wrote something I know in my heart and I keep trying to focus on: What Godly character traits are you trying to grow in me? Thanks for writing His words to us and keeping us focused on Him.
This is a FANTASTIC article!!! I loved every bit of it! I have found (with me) that age and maturity has really played a big part
in my contentment. My priorities seemed to have really changed with the onset of grandchildren, a move to another city, a new job
a new church (with a pastor who has made a wonderful difference in my life), new friends, neighbors. I just LOVE the feeling
I have (finally) of being content in my life. Sure there are still times….but, not nearly as often or as “important”. When it
finally sinks in that ‘material things’ are not what is important in life…that makes all the difference! I have found what is “important”….contentment in my life with God.
Contentment comes from being happy with what you have and where you are. It’s a difficult thing, because we’re human and we’re always comparing ourselves and things. At least I know I do. Happiness is a choice. It’s not about what you have, where you are, or who you’re with. It’s about you. Building a relationship with God can cultivate happiness and contentment. I know I’m a constant comparison shopper.
Fasting from media- I did it…I’m doing it. We got rid of cable. The only thing is, it provides me with time for other things. It’s still all in how you choose to use your time.
Now I’m going to catch up on my other emails and read today’s Proverbs 31 Ministries post.
This is a great article. I am so in the depths of despair right now and I really need this advice! Lately, my life has taken a downward spiral, but not really from circumstances, because nothing there has really changed, but from within. I just don’t seem to be able to find contentment or joy right now. I would love any advice. Would love to peak at your new book, but will have to wait awhile to afford it. Sounds wonderful. Thanks though for today’s message. I really need it.
We are all God’s children and while many like to post the “fluff” that we all read in the virtual world and not the “dirt” we must remember to stay focused on what’s most important – everything that’s under our own roofs because of Him “fluff” and “dirt”.
Great reminder today…thanks for sharing…
I think I get discontent when I’m not grateful for exactly what God has given me. When I repent, I have His perspective and I’m not anxious about my own life. Right now, it’s winter and I’m not content with very cold, freezing weather and snow and ice. My husband says, “God has put us here, not Florida!” I repent and He gives me the grace to accept where He has put us. I bundle up and face the weather with a smile on my face—thanking Him for good health and ability to go outside in the first place! Thanks for you blog. I enjoy it!
I have found that being thankful for others and rejoicing with them for what God is doing in their life helps me keep things in perspective and then I look forward to what God is doing and is going to do in and for me.
Great devotional. Yes, we are now faced with everyones life day after day through the computer world. I pray daily for the Lord to calm my heart, and be content with what i have. I pray that I am reminded that these “things” are just that – “things”. They don’t make me any more special, or less of a person. I have found to try to live with less, and spend more time with Him has helped me in this area of contentment – and still growing in it.
Thanks for your devotional – Colleen G.
I struggle with contentment and I’m realizing it more now when I login to FB. I’ve tried deactivating my account so many times, but then get lonely when my friends don’t call or write. I’m ashamed to admit I struggle with contentment, because God has blessed me with so much. Why do I struggle with this? I do understand there’a a timing for everything. I think my struggle is bringing me closer to God.
Glad I discovered your blog through the Proverbs 31 post. I read this on the PERFECT day since I was just complaining to my hubby how I feel “less than” a certain friend and yes, it is all from what I read from her FB posts. I KNOW better than that!!! In fact, I feel that people that post so many braggish comments must need to feel validated in some way. Thanks for this great reminder that I am so blessed and oh yeah… I am very CONTENT too!!!
What do you think of this statement: discontentment comes from counting someone else’s blessings instead of your own?
I sometimes catch myself comparing parts of my life to others by comparing their material possessions. When really If it were justifiable to compare at all, I am comparing apples to oranges. What I mean by that is I know better than to compare, especially others meaningless, of this world THINGS because that is not what my heart seeks. I don’t think it is okay to compare at all as I always tell my children “when you compare & measure yourself with others you always come up SHORT!” I needed to hear your message today as I get caught up in feeling inadequate when I focus on what I want and don’t have. I am reminded that God promised to meet all of our needs, not our wants! KS
I struggle with contentment all the time. But lately I’ve noticed that I’m on the other end of the spectrum of where I usually find myslef. God has blessed me immensely in the past couple of months and I’m so happy it scares me. I find it hard to believe sometimes that God has answered my prayers and happiness has found its way into my life after so many years of hard struggles. Its been a different struggle of faith for me lately reminding myself that not only does it take faith to believe God will answer your prayers, it also takes faith to realize when He has.
Thank you for today’s devotional.
I struggle with contentment daily. I constantly battle the feelings of I’m not good enough, smart enough, etc…I’m learning how to pray and give God my worries, struggles and anxiety and be thankful for what He has blessed my family and I with.
I just struggled with this this past weekend. I thought I was doing much better in this area and then it hit me like a ton of bricks. As I was on facebook, I saw that a friend of mine had started her own blog and she was ecstatic about the number of hits it had gotten in 24 hours, about the number of hits it took me several months to reach on mine. Part of me was so excited for her and part of me started playing the comparison/discontentment game, ugh, I hate that game.
After I read your devotional about the Joneses, I read your free chapter from your book & bang, bang, bang. Too many bullseyes to count. This is something God’s been talking to me about for years. I realize it but getting past it is the hard part. I’m learning to repeat “I trust You, Jesus” whenever I feel I need to take over. The whole contentment & control issue are all tied up together for me…..not being content means I feel the need to take control & fix it. Thank you for your mirror.
Our pastor just finished a sermon series on the comparison trap. It’s so hard not to measure ourselves according to worldly standards. Two take-homes from message–”There is no win in comparison, ” and just try to see yourself through your Heavenly Father’s eyes.
I think I can find myself discontented when I think about the talents that other people have instead of focusing on what God has given me. I forget that we all have a place in this world, each have our own talents and abilities that are just right for what we were made to do. When I become discontent, I steal from the time/energy I could be putting into those things that God has put in MY heart.
I try to steer clear of “window shopping” so that I don’t covet things that I can’t afford. I think the best way to shop is to ask the LORD along with you…He gives you wisdom and helps you be discerning. He’s a faithful friend and guide!
It makes me very sad to see how much the young girls air out their emotions on Facebook and Twitter. Things are said in haste and everyone becomes involved in the drama. I had a conversation with my daughter about it and she told me they were dumb to do it. I told her they were hurting and searching for someone to to trust and confide in….they need Jesus. So when comparing yourself with the Joneses….remember the STUFF they have sometimes covers up the hurt they may have in the same way these young girls air their emotions.
I KNOW that I could benefit greatly from a “media fast”! I might even be surprised to learn that not only can I live without Facebook, Twitter, and continuous texting, I would be more content and joyful! Today’s devotion was phenomenal and right on target!!!
My contentment is definately linked to my focus. If my focus is on myself, or the day-to-day chaos that is my life, I tend to view the happenings of the Joneses in a negative light. But if I am having a “clear” focused day (where I spend alone with God for direction and clarity), I can celebrate the Joneses success WITH and FOR them without jealousy or discontentment.
While I enjoy my gadgets and electronic toys, I have to be very careful to not allow them to take over. Some days I’m more successful than others. However, I’ve found that it helps if I limit myself to only logon to social media for a few minutes, twice a day. I’ve also turned off the facebook alerts on my phone. Otherwise, when the phone dings, I respond unconsciously by picking up the phone to view the alert or message (even if I have supassed by 2 a day rule already). It’s an everyday struggle to “fix my eyes on what is unseen”! (2Cor 4:18)
Thank-you for your much needed encouragement through God’s word. I have been overwhelmed, weary and teary in my situation lately. When friends our age are enjoying their empty nest and freedom, we are helping raise our son’s 3 year old daughter every 2 weeks putting our plans on hold. I have taken my eyes off of Jesus and onto our “poor us” situation lately. Today my eyes are coming back on Jesus and I am standing on His promise that I can do all things through Christ who strenghtens me; to pour into the life of this precious little one.
From time to time I have put myself on a Facebook fast. It does make me a little nervous to do that because family and friends seem to use Facebook to get information out quickly. No one uses the telephone anymore. I have also tried to spend time in the word and with God before going online. Emphasis is on the word “tried”. I am a work in progress.
You will never know how much I needed this today and how much it has helped me. I will be honest – I often allow my P31 devotions pile up a little before reading them. Today I saw the title “The Joneses are Overrated” and decided to take a break and read it.
I am currently consumed with comparisons. I compare myself and my life to everyone and everything. I compare my career choice, my relationship, my lack of children, my physical appearance, etc. I am beyond overwhelmed. I have known I needed to let this go and have read and prayed over that wonderful verse Paul wrote but have yet to find relief.
The part that really hit home today was that true contentment was “more than just a throwing up of arms in reluctant acceptance. At its hub it literally means: “to be satisfied to the point where I am no longer disturbed or disquieted.” ” This is where I have been going wrong. I need to ask God to change my heart any my perspective and not feel like I am just content to give up.
I want to be content to focus only on Jesus and to feel truly at peace with my life. I want to listen to what He has to say to me and work on the things He wants me to work on.
Thank you so much for this blog. It came at a time when I desperately needed it.
Please enter me in the drawing for the Contentment Giveaway. This is the 5th time in a week God has brought the subject of contentment up in my life. One sermon i listened to this week said “comparison is the death of contentment.” This is something I’ve been struggling with my whole life and I believe God is telling me it’s time to deal with it! Thanks!
I get jealous of other women who always seem to have it all together…..that is so not me I’m always on the treadmill just trying to keep up
Thank you for the perfect devotional and subject, Karen. Actually it happens to be my bday, and I am not sure how for others, but this is the time of the year when I start comparing myself the most- to what I thought I’d be by this age or to the others and where they are at the same age. I think you gave the perfect advice- focus on Jesus and not what/who is around us. Since we are humans, and it is sooo easy to slip and start comparing ourselves again in a matter of minutes sometimes, I think it takes a major effort and discipline to keep our eyes on Jesus non-stop no matter what comes up.
Oh, this rang so true to me. I lived in the land of discontentment for years. Discontent with my house, my husband, my job, my life…on and on. I finally got free from it, by looking at the blessings, the little things in my life which in turn helped me realize how blessed I was in the big things. Blessings orchestrated by God!
I hate to admit though, FB or Pinterest can take me back to that land so easily. I have often thought about a “fast” from social media. I would love come accountability partners to do it with…Any takers?
What is a women to do? We need to let the frustrations go and learn to breathe in what God is trying to tell us in these moments. Giving in to the frustrations is what keeps us from enjoying God’s blessings. Contentment comes from only knowing you are loved and yes sometimes we fail and are not perfect but he is. The moment you feel overwhelmed, or frustrated and not content, ask yourself is this what God wants. Pray and ask God to help you with these feelings. Peace will come because you asked him first, to help you with all the junk that comes alone with discontent, frustrations and looking at our situations instead of him. I think your book will be a great read for myself and others. I intend to get it and so I can share it to help others. Enjoy your devotions.
I have struggled with contentment, especially with my home. We rent. So especially when it starts getting time to sign a new lease, I start dreaming of places to buy that are out of our budget. This year we will probably move instead of renewing our lease, and I need to be practical and within our budget as we start looking again. One thing that does help me be more content is to keep my home clean and clutter free keeping in mind that my smaller home is a lot easier to clean.
I seem to go back and forth with “I can do this, Lord. Show me the truth of the situation and help me to see where I need to grow and learn” to “I give up; I want out; Why me?!” On the strong days, I am joyful in the Lord and thankful for His mercies and His teaching; on my weaker days – it’s a pure self-pity party.
I totally agree with the statement “discontentment comes from counting someone’s else blessings instead of our own. This is something I have tried to work on in my life. I find it is a daily process. I have to keep my focus on Jesus and stay in prayer because it’s so easy to look at others and feel like I’m doing my best to live for Christ and others seem to get all the breaks and they are not even saved. I just remind myself God has a plan for me and everyone else and he knows what I need. Excited at the opportunity to be entered into this drawing. Thanks for all you do.
I think social media plays a huge role in our lives today sometimes in a positive manner and sometimes not so much. I recently finished a seven day fast from facebook and I am amazed how good it felt to not know about every posting. Emotions are very powerful and we are what we think. Social media can be a positive influence if we monitor what we focus on.. I will set time limits going forward and focus on positive feedback so as not to compare my life to others. God needs to be our #1 focal point.
Another timely post
I’ve never considered a media fast but what a great idea! Currently, I already know it’s unfair, but I struggle with comparing myself with the awesome mama’s at my church. Thing is that I’m one of the few working full-time. When they show up with their delicious home cooked meals and I show up with my store-bought items, it stings a bit when Hubby can’t stop talking about how good a home-cooked meal is. Anyways, there are so many examples but this is just a recent one. Thank you for this opportunity.
I don’t struggle with comparing my things to others, I compare myself. Am I as good a mom, a wife, a woman than others.
I haven’t ever thought about limiting what I look at online as much as I have thought about limiting my time.
yes i do find it hard to find any contentment but that started long ago when my parents didn’t even show contentment with me and hard to find as a homeschooling mom that is overwhelmed with no help from anyone
yes find it very hard when social media like facebook and pintrest ect trying to make us feel inferior. But as hard as it is I keep going and trying to remember to continue to ask God for help and strength to continue
Thank you for this reminder. I needed it this morning! I am a mother of 4, wife of one, have a 40+ hour a week job but live in a town that’s considered Gold Coast. I look out the window of my 1950s rented home and across the street I see a 2 million dollar mansion. In fact all three houses across the street are the same. My husband is a grad student who wants to teach the Old Testament someday and has been going to school and working to help support us. 5 months ago his store closed and he lost his job. He is still looking. I am so struggling with being content with what we have ( or don’t). Trying to understand and accept why God is allowing this in our lives when we are sacrificing already to have him in school, following Gods will. Why us? is a frequent cry. Funny thing is I am reading through the Bible in a year and the last month has been the life of Job. Talk about providential and a arrow to the heart. I am not even CLOSE to being as faithful to Job, yet he never questions God. I need this study. Help! :0)
I like the statement “discontentment comes from counting someone’s else blessings instead of our own.” It is sometimes hard to see our own blessings when we look at everyone else’s. I need to dwell on my blessings and rely more on God. I am signed up for Melissa’s Let It Go bible study.
I have struggled with self esteem/self image ever since I was a little girl … so I frequently find myself in a state of discontent … wishing we had a house, wishing we had another car, wishing I was thinner, wishing I was a better, stronger Christian …. wishing my daughter would make better choices (her bad decisions MUST be my fault somehow)… and yet, deep down, I know that God loves ME and that with Him, I can be content no matter what else is going on. There was one time in my life where I completely surrendured: we had been trying to conceive a 3rd child for 8 years (I had always dreamed of having 4 children) and it did not happen. One day, I looked around my house, at my children and my husband and I thought “God, you have given me so much … i have a healthy daughter, a healthy son, a wonderful husband….wow. It’s ok, God … I can be content with this, it is so much more than others have.” It was an amazing feeling … and a little over a month later? A surprise positive PG test and now I have a beautifully healthy 5 year old son. God is good, isn’t He?
Yes, I feel this is a struggle for me because I just feel “life’s not fair” at times…I try to just glance at social media like FBook to keep up with important things and the positivity of my Christian friends…I try not to focus on what they have and I emphasis to my kids daily that sometimes “life’s not fair”….but disappointments can make you stronger. I am a single mom who has learned over the past four years that trusting and praying to God and reading His Word is the best way to deal with life’s disappointments.
Contentment is a choice and if we really look around us, we see God’s hand at work. But I believe we forget that choice is not always easyand takes work some times…hard euchiesto. God is good even when we wallow in feeling sorry for ourselves and He is who can cling too when we are struggling. I have found writing those blessings down daily has turned my perspective around and I find myself asking God what will my heart see today
Wow – that is it! Discontentment results from counting someone else’s blessings, rather than your own. I know that definitely fits me!
I have only recently become aware that this is an issue for me. I recently heard someone say that she finds herself getting discontended with what she has when she shops certain boutiques so she avoids them because she knows those feelings crop up so she just doesn’t go in there anymore. I found that statement so profound because I do that too without even realizing it!
I try my best to be content with what I have, and it is not that hard usually. I am very thankful for everything we have. Emails sent from company’s showing you (and trying to get you to buy!) the latest and greatest make that a little hard sometimes though. I just have to remember the saying, “don’t try to fix what’s not broke”.
Karen, this looks great!
Trying to get organized so I do not feel so overwhelmed.I just wan t to keep up with me!
I absolutely think that social media can contribute to that feeling of discontentment. I have to check myself often and remind myself of God’s truth, so as to not fall into the “everyone else’s life is perfect” trap!
I completely agree that social media has made it easier to feel discontentment. I have a wonderful life and am scratching my head at the thoughts that run through my mind from time to time based on what I see on twitter and Facebook.
I have definitely been having some issues with this lately; God is bringing our family through some humbling experiences in this season. I had to go to a food bank recently because we ran out of money before we ran out of month. But God, (and Karen), I don’t WANT to learn humility! But He always knows where we need to grow and how to get us there. I keep reminding myself it’s only in this country where we might be considered poor: we are actually incredibly blessed and rich beyond measure in what matters.
I struggle with contentment daily.. not necessarily with other things but contentment with myself (I AM a good mom, a loving wife, etc.) I always seem to find the disappointment in my everyday life (I didnt clean, I didnt workout, etc.) I am trying to learn that everyday (and all that happened or didnt happen) is a blessing.
I know that contentment should be easier to come by–I truly am very blessed. I don’t do Pinterest–I do think I might feel a lot more inadequate if I did. I do struggle with looking at what others have, especially when it somehow seems “unfair”. I know that this is not healthy, but I do have a hard time making it stop.
I guess I have had this problem since high school–I was never one of the popular kids…
I am looking forward to learning how to stop focusing so much on what others have or do…
Carissa in eastern Iowa
I haven’t done a complete fast, but I have “hidden” a few people I found myself making comparisons with, or becoming envious of.
I think its funny how I operate in a all or nothing mentality. I have a heart for missions and would sell all I own to go live in a desolate country, but in the states, I feel the need to make the most of what I have. I get trapped thinking a well maintained, decorated home is what represents responsibility of time and finances. That being on top of all the toddler projects and always having something creative to do with my kids is what makes me a good mom. I don’t even think I operate in the “counting others” blessings. I know I don’t judge others by decor/ activities, I just feel personally responsible for mine, and if I’m not always tackling something then I’m not being a good steward/ mom/ wife/ friend.
I’m focusing on fulfilling emotional needs. That if my house has joy and peace, we’re ok. But that’s really hard to lose sight of when I know I’m capable of more. But capable shouldn’t be a burden. I’ve allowed it to turn into that.
I struggle with contentment a lot!! I see what my friends, coworkers and family members have and do for themselves and children. This really hits my heart hard, because I can’t do and provide those things. Then I get down on myself and feel I am letting my kids down, because they do good in school and deserve those things. I know I am supposed to “run my race” and not worry about what others are doing. But in this world that is so materialistic that is something that is really hard to do. I thank you for all the tools and ideas you provide this mother and wife – they have helped me tremendously.
You hit the nail 0n the head. – I feel like im letting my kids down because I can’t provide the biggest and best and shiniest things. Like I don’t deserve them. I even apologized to them ( when they were babies. – before they could speak!) that they didn’t have a better Mom who could provide more. Pathetic. I need this study-
Karen – lets try to start a media revolution! You can create a post that all of us can paste Into our FB status – something like ‘taking a social media break to get my discontentment in alignment , going to spend some P31 time with The only one that matters ”
I really feel the social media really changing the thoughts of many women. Logging into Facebook or twitter and you see what other moms are doing with their kids, families and home. And that in itself adds more pressure on us moms. And we are so easy to forget our own blessings and what we have and what we are doing in our own homes. Moms need to understand its okay to have dirty dishes and laundry. We are only human. We are not created to be prefect . and I am very guilty of this. I always want everything to be prefect and get very anxious when it’s not. I pray every day for patience.
another thing that gets my goat in the area of contentment is im always sick and have had a lot of suffering and i look at others with easy lives, i get discontented easily.
This is absolutely true! We are to give our requests to God, who promises to supply all our needs. We are not to worry, especially about the material things in life. We are not to be envious, but are to rejoice in others’ successes. We are to give thanks in everything, even rejoicing in affliction. All these and more we know from God’s promises and instructions, yet it is hard not to compare, especially when someone has what we want. And more so if it seemed to come more easily to them or it seems they don’t fully appreciate the gift they received. I would love to read of your encouragement on this. Thanks for your giveaway. Many blessings!
Contentment is a struggle for me. I do look around and think she has it all (or at least once piece of the puzzle) and I’m empty-handed. Even among my Christian friends I tend to desire what they have. I forget that I have a wonderful husband and kids. They aren’t perfect, but neither am I and neither is my friend.
I think social media adds more pressure. My friend writes about how much her hubby does for her and I get jealous. Or someone makes a tasty dish off Pinterest and I feel guilty about all the pins I’ve made but haven’t taken action. And I realize is just need to Let.It.Go.
Contentment was something I struggled with for years. I always wanted the best house with the best decor, a really amazing wardrobe, awesome vacations, etc. But the Lord has dealt with me on these issues over the last 10 years. By paying every cent of credit card debt I racked up trying to keep up with “The Joneses” and NOT filing bankruptcy, I have learned a HUGE lesson. I still have struggles and temptation but when I focus on loving God with all my heart and all my soul and all my mind I much more content than anything the world can give.
I was just hit in the face with this issue last night while watching the Super Bowl. I was wishing my husband would be more romantic, attentive… like her husband… you know all of those terrible comparisons we make. Then I saw a friend’s status on facebook. His wife passed away a month ago and all it said was, “I used to think 8 hours was a long time to be without you, I don’t know how I’ve made it a month. I can’t wait to be in Heaven with you.” I looked at my husband and with tears in my eyes. I asked him and God to forgive me for my selfish ways. I would love you win your book! I’ve checked our libraries around where I live and none have it so I would be happy to donate it once I’m finished with it to help other women like myself!
I have realized as the years have wore on how my control issues have affected my whole life – school, marriage, even my career. As a fourth generation Italian-American, I watch how I have been raised with a culture that gratifies women who are controlling in the name of “liberating”; yet, I find that the Lord is calling me to do something differently. I can’t wait to delve into this study – my soul is craving for it.
Contentment- I thought I was the only one that struggles with the whole looking at Facebook and Pinterest.. UGH!!! It hurts. I desire to be content, I strive for my children to be content, why can’t I be content. I have a loving Father who died for me why can’t I just be happy?
Karen, your devotion today put in perspective what God has already been tugging on my heart about recently. I have realized that my struggles seem to be magnified by social media (specifically Facebook for me). Recently I have had little desire to look at or post on Facebook for the same reasons you described. When I have had a thought about posting something I have asked myself ,”Why would I post this?” The answer was usually to put myself in the comparison of others for all to see. So I have just chose not to. Thank you for putting it into more of a scriptural perspective! Your obedience to share Gods word and heart on this subject confirmed Gods tug gave me more clarity!
I will also be sharing with a struggling friend!
With media it is so easy to pretend. To be fake. My sis-in-laws facebook page makes me sick because she has the picture perfect life. She posts pics of her big house, perfectly decorated, with nice furniture, her darling daughter with all her accomplishments, her amazing husband who does x,y, and z, etc. But I know her real life. Her husband lives in a locked room upstairs, is dating other women, and not providing for his family. Her daughter has several health issues and is behind in developemental growth. They cannot get a mortgage on their huge house because they don’t make enough so they are just paying a “fee” to the bank to let them live there. But to look at her facebook or pinterest page you would think she has got it made. You would want her life and feel discontented with yours. I think it is good to keep in mind that everybody has problems. There are no perfect lives. No perfect people. The person who has the perfect facebook life may just be trying to hide the nightmare they are living.
I need a lot of help with counting my blessings and nt being worries, stressed, and anxious all the time!!!!
I’ve been struggling with this for sure – but more for keeping up with what I think others expect of me. I don’t worry so much about the perfect house or car or clothes. My struggle is rooted in WHO I should be. I compare against “better” moms, “better” wives, “better” Christians. My husband wants to keep up to a standard he has in his mind of where we should be in life, so I try everything in my powers to bend the finances to afford things (and stretching the dollars to cover it all), to take the vacations, to keep the kids in sports, while wearing myself out. I’m a juggler. And I’m tired. And now that our oldest son has been diagnosed with a GI issue that requires a special whole food/whole grain/low dairy diet, I’m trying to keep up with that while working full-time. I NEED to let it go. It’s just the how. How do I do it without it all crashing down?
Discontentment comes from counting someone else’s blessings instead of your own..when we look at what others receive it is easy to think less of what we have. If you get stuck in this rut it may be very hard to get out and you may very well become discontented.
Thanks for a great devotional this morning that speaks directly to me. I am constantly comparing myself to everyone that I “see” online and have to remind myself that all I am seeing are the best snapshots of their lives. I only need to focus on Christ and His plan for my life and the life of my family. I struggle with wanting to give up the internet completely but then I would miss out on encouragement from the likes of you, Karen! So it’s all about balance, which is pretty much impossible unless my focus remains on Christ and His perfect love.
My word for 2013 is contentment! It’s such a struggle for me.
I also struggle with contentment, and the media doesn’t make it any easier. It is all around us to want more, have more, do more. Contentment is something worth striving for!
if you count other people’s blessings, you’ll never be happy. I had a Bible study years ago, when I had to write down each day’s joys and blessings. It was amazing how many there were, and some so simple. From going through nearly 10 years of difficult financial times, I have learned to appreciate and love the blessings that are not materialistic – my children, good health for all the family, seeing a beautiful sunset, walking in the woods, strolling along a beach, etc. Those so-called “hardship” years were great because I gained contentment by enjoying the most important things in life rather than material possessions. I do like posssessions too, but my happiness is not dependent on them.
Yes, I think that social media leaves you feeling discontented, esp when you see your friends and other people buying clothes and other things.
Contentment is something worth striving for! I think I get it under control then the social media sets me back. I’m also thinking this will be even a bigger problem as my kids & grandkids get bigger so that scares me alot.
I struggle with the contentment issue- I tend to be a little addicted to Pinterest. I refuse to join any FB/ myspace type website. I have been instituting a media fast in my home, where my whole family unplugs- then plugs in to a family activity (devotions, a board game, discussion). It does help
I have gone on a media fast and it was very freeing. It does help to align you with what is right with the world. I also find contentment when I start my day with God. Breathing in the silence of the morning and reading and listening focuses me to make it through my day.
It’s too easy to compare yourself with someone else – something I’ve struggled with for years.
Discontentment…seems from a young age we were taught to be better, compare, win….and so, Its kindda became a sad part of society…judging and comparing instead of seeing what God wants us ro be.
I think social media is a huge killer of contentment. Everybody looks their best on facebook and can say anything they want without anyone knowing whether it is true. Some people make it sound like their life, husband and kids are beyond perfect all the time – and there is no way that is true! I like your saying about discontentment coming from counting other people’s blessings instead of our own – that is so true!
Hello. I just found your blog today. It was an amazing read. It was something that is current in my life. I’m a mom of one and one on the way. As I was reading about the Joneses, I saw that in how I feel about a lot of people. I see everyday on facebook how someone is doing this, someone is making that. I’ve even had to go so far as to hide some friends and families posts because they can make it pretty overwelming. Im very happy for them, but some like to just throw it in everyones faces. I do wish I had something I could sell and make lots of money, I wish I had my own home. I wish I could cook better. How I feel when these people post is a bit of jelousy. I need to start learning to put God first and know he will provide my family with what we need. And God has given me talents that others cant do. So, at the end of all that, I need to count my blessings and be thankful for everything.
I heard this definition of contentment long ago, and it has always stuck with me….”Contentment is wanting what you have.” So many times it has helped me to think on the things I DO have, not on what I DON’T have.
I love that definition! It’s goign in my journal. Thank you.
i’m really struggling with contentment right now. i’ve always compared my situation with others, and God has recently been working on *trust* with me. trusting that i’m where i’m supposed to be, that i’m who i’m supposed to be, and mostly, that i have exactly what i need.
To avoid comparing myself to others, I acknowledge that everyone has been blessed with special talents.
I find that many times we all get sucked into the keeping up with the Joneses. It’s so easy to see what everyone else is buying, where they are going and everyone wants you to think their kids are perfect, with social media. When I get caught up in thinking wow….I need to be going on this great vacation or buying that expensive car, I am reminded of the many people who have it worse than I do. They would give almost anything to have what I have and it can all be lost so easily. People are so far in debt these days that they are an illness away from losing it all. So when I find myself wanting to get discouraged, I just think of all that I do have and that someone, somewhere wishes they had the same!
contentment with myself is a struggle.
I have struggled with contentment, but am really trying to see what God has for me in my current circumstances. For me Facebook is a way to get glimpses into people’s lives with whom I otherwise would not be able to have contact. Try to see comments as a way to pray/praise though sometimes hard not to wish I also was experiencing some of the things about which I read.
Wow this is sooooo interesting, I just got off of a media fast. I remember one night I was crying out to God asking him what was wrong with me and why I didnt feel the same as I used to. I was noticing I was growing a little envy towards some ppl on facebook and other social media sites because I was seeing how luxurious they were living or so I thought. After reading his word and crying for an hour God spoke to my heart and told me to start a media fast. It was amazing how much more time I spent with him and even with myself just letting my brain rest It felt amazing. I’ve learned that with all this social media it is very easy to lose yourself in it and lose focus on whats really important. I feel much better and have honestly only been on facebook for less than 5 minutes since the fast. I also limited my sons time for TV and internet. Now we spend more time together, he is not a fan of it…yet.
Its funny because this blog was pretty much like a confirmation to what God had told me to do and I am happy I listened. God Bless you and Thank You!
Keeping up with the Joneses changed our family’s life forever, and NOT in a good way. I can relate to Philippians 4:12 “I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.” We lost everything. It needed to happen to bring my husband and I closer together and closer to God. I am currently writing a book about it. Crazy… how nothing surprises our Lord…
So often I see what others have, and then I want. I think that is the biggest source of discontententment. If I stop and actually see what I have at this moment, I realize I am blessed. I have a job, a place to live, health, food, family and friends, etc..- there really isn’t a single reason why I should be discontent.
yes I too could use a media fast at times……it is hard we have to keep our perspectives right and aligned with Christ and remember it’s easy to throw things out there on media but only God knows if those people are being forthcoming or not and I have discovered alot of them exaggerate the truth and too there is no way all the people in our facebook Friend list are actual friends so remembering these things make it easier NOT to lose sight and be content with where God has each of us individually
I could use a media fast
. I often compare myself to other Mamas who are doing cool things and wear cool clothes and are so beautiful, and crafty, and rich,etc… 
. Thank you for this post and the reminder to find my contentment in Christ.
I feel this is one of the main reasons we have to be transparent with each other. Christian women often try so hard to appear to have it all together, that it can be deceiving to people who are hurting. When I went through a sudden and devasting divorce, it was so hard not to feel judged at church, even though I had not done anything “wrong”. God has really used that experience in my life to show me that we need to be honest with each other, so that there is no need for comparisons. When I focus on Him, I become much more content.
Thank you, you said it well. Transparent. Great word.
I love your blog. I enjoy Pinterest the most due to finding people with the same interests and sharing that same interest through pictorial postings. My creativity and interests has grown and expanded. It’s so much fun! Their blessing blesses mel.
Hi! I loved your devotional today thanks! I am struggling with this today actually haha God works in mysterious ways right? Ok so some relatives of mine are going out to dinner and I felt a little jealous because we had canned chicken noodle soup with bread and butter. I tried being happy for them but also wanting to be able to go out to dinner (but on a tight budget). Before I had even read this I was thinking of this same scritpure that Paul wrotes and had prayed at supper for the Lord to help us be grateful whether we have soup or steak! haha Then I just read your devotional with the Same scripture and knew God is up to something
I need to just “let it go” and remember God’s continual provision whether we have a little or a lot!
Just read your blog on Proverbs 31 Ministries email and had to check out your webpage. I have struggled with contentment to an extreme lately. We were probably a “Jones type family”. Married, 2 great sons, stay at home Mom and active in church. When their Dad suddenly died unexpectedly my wonderful sons turned to drugs to escape. Jail and the possibility of prison……it’s hard to find contentment when your heart is breaking. I have friends going through the same thing and its hard
Is there ever going to be real contentment in this broken world? I think not, just contentment in knowing God has not forsaken any of us, and HE is coming back!
We may possibly not ever experience a lasting contentment, however, we can experience that peace beyond understanding (Phillipians 4:7). Yes, He is coming back!!
I often feel content because our family, since our marriage, has chosen to live below our means. This does not mean that I don’t wish I have my friends’ lifestyle, but after taking Dave Ramsey’s class, I do feel consoled.
Comparison, self doubt, feelings of intimidation when I am around “successfull” women are all things I struggle with, daily, since I was young. Very young. I remember these feelings since elementary school. I have lived through some very bad times in the last few years. If I had remembered to reach toward God. And remember that He made me special, He has a purpose for me, and I need to be confident in His gift of grace and love. I would not have suffered. To see how many other women struggle with these same things breaks my heart, but will feed my prayers. I keep seeing we are all broken in some way. We all have masks. I am learning to not use a mask. To be completely real, and allow my imperfections to show. I believe that is what God wants. It makes me approachable to the other woment hurting as I have been.
God Bless, thank you so much for you devotion today.
Gain contentment by taking your eyes off those irritating Jones’s and fixing them firmly on God! Those Jones’s are probably less contented than you if the truth’s known
Love the journal!
I don’t think I compare myself with other people’s stuff or kids, but I do get frustrated with how it ‘appears’ to be so easy for so many to make things look nice. I’m not good at doing nails or decorating tables or putting together fancy outfits, and sometimes I feel very dowdy.
I HOPE I WIN!!!!!
Now that I got that out of the way, my thoughts….I struggle with wanting MONEY! Don’t get me wrong, I am blessed! But, I am tempted to want to be like the Joneses that have plenty of extra money and take family vacations all the time! I want to be able to buy what I want for my children and not have to think about it twice. When I catch myself “dreaming”, I remind myself that this world is NOT my home and God is in control! If HE wanted me to have more money, HE is certainly capable of making it happen. (Please don’t think I use this as an excuse to do nothing – I do things to help me make money…I just don’t freak out worrying about it). Thanks for asking!
I struggle more with contentment in the area of being a mother and wife. Sometimes I wish my husband worked the hours of other husbands or I kept my house like others, etc. In order to overcome this, I have to remind myself that my trials and blessings are mine. I cannot compare myself to anyone else, and I have to remind myself that God allows all of this for me, for my good. I love thinking about this and I love the Bible Study already!
I have always struggled with being content until God saw fit to take almost everything away from us. Since then I have learned to be content in what ever state I am in.
Contentment is a lifestyle that is hard to choose. When my husband and I first got martied we had mext to no money. My friends who had chosen careers over university, had lavish weddings , owned their houses , drove 2 cars while we had 3 kids , no money but a lot of love. I struggled with jealousy, anger and resentment until I found that God can fill those empty spots in our lives
thank you for your devotionals… My coworker ( and friend) and I often read them together and talk about them at lunch!
Everyday there are moments where I can choose envy or I can choose contentment. I love Pinterest! But I have learned to “unfollow” boards that are all about aquiring more stuff, whether it is outfits, home furnishings, travel ideas, etc. I love to see things that challenge me to DO something, MAKE something, COOK something, BE something. Contentment for me often means remembering that those that have things I envy also have things that I would never desire. Just as there are parts of my life that I would not want to ever give up: family, friends and community, God. We are doing a sermon series on God’s provision as Jireh, and I am learning that God provides to each of us what we need.
Today I am struggling with contentment. We have missed the last three sundays of church with various illnesses, we just keep passing germs around! And we only miss church if we are sick or out of town. This just feels ridiculous! I am struggling with being the mom of littles with all this illness and grumpiness that comes with it. This is where God has put me, and I am struggling to be content in it.
Oddly enough, I gave up keeping up with the cool people when we lived in Orange County CA, but there are other kinds of unrest and unhappiness in us, and it makes me sad.
I saw my ex-husband and his new girlfriend a week or so ago and they were driving a brand new Caddy. At first I felt a little sad and like when am I going to have such luxuries. Then I said, “wait a minute-my car is only a couple years old but it’s paid for.” It’s not a luxury car and is small for all of us (it just forces us to stay close-lol) but it is dependable and wonderful too. I’m sure his Caddy isn’t but I chose to feel happy for them that they were enjoying life’s good things. It was the car we had dreamed of together. I’ve been praying for forgiveness and I truly am content in my life. In many areas I just don’t miss what he brought to my life. I do miss the good things I enjoyed about him (he had warm hands to hold) and I pray for him too. The Lord is truly my husband and recently provided a job in which I am challenged and blessed. I have people in my life whom I love, are consistent,and are my prayer buddies. While life isn’t easy I do feel so blessed and am thankful.
I love that quote about discontentment! So true. I actually started a Facebook fast 10 days ago. I was in constant comparison mode and besides that…it just chewed up so much of my time and attention. I wanted to give my family more face time and my Bible pages needed a little more activity. I won’t lie though…it has been very challening. I find myself sitting at my computer with no where to go. Or realizing that the thing I just did or took a photo of is no longer going to be broadcast (let’s face it…most of the time I was bragging anyway…ugh..that’s a tough truth).
Contentment is hard. All your life you imagine what it would be like to be an adult. Then you become one and wonder how you got to where you are. I did not accept Jesus into my life until after I was married and in my later 30′s. My life now is not at all what I expected. Yes, I have kids, but didn’t have them until I was older. I did not expect to move states away from my family and friends. I think we forget that God has a great plan and we shoul enjoy the ride. Easier said than done. Would love to win your book!!
I do think discontentment comes from counting other people’s blessings. I am guilty of this often – I see things others have or think that they look better than I do (I struggle with being overweight and don’t often feel good about how I look) and then I am not content. I have learned however that all is usually not as it appears on the outside. I am also learning to go to God when I feel a need to compare myself with the Joneses. He has blessed (and continues to bless) my life so very richly, I just need to remember to be grateful for my many, many blessings and not jealous of something that I perceive someone else is or may have.
My struggles with contentment center mostly around time…my job requires an incredible amount of my time and energy. While I try to always be thankful I have a job, I have excessive envy of my friends who either don’t work or who work less demanding jobs. My dream it’s to have time to devote to volunteering, devotion and study of God’s Word, walking, and even cleaning and organizing my house. But at the same time I realize how much I have to be thankful for and feel unworthy for craving something different.
Would love to win!
I constantly read “eyes on Jesus” or foucs on Him to counteract discontentment, but what does that really mean? What does that look like, sound like? Just spending time with him? Karen, would you address this in your blog sometime?
I do not want to keep up with everyone else. Help me Lord to look to you. Enjoying your book.
There’s a lot of areas I know I need to “let go”. Everytime I hear the song forgiveness on the radio it’s a constant reminder. I hope to find this book at our library someday.
I think a spirit of discontent keeps us from focusing on all of our blessings.
When I am discontented, I focus on what I don’t have rather than all the
blessings I do experience. I love that verse that teaches us to be content
no matter what. Something I am still learning to do.
I have struggled with contentment. I’m trying to learn as Paul stated in Philipians the reason for contentment. The more you lean on Jesus, the more you’re content with what you have and the less you worry about wanting what other people have.
I struggle with contentment. Although I’m happy for the success of my friends, I still feel a pang of envy. I try to think about all my blessings when I have these moments, and it helps a little
Thank you for this posting. It could not have come at a better time. We, in this family, are struggling with contentment. I will honestly admit that I wish I could be just like some of my friends who take nice vacations, buy new cars, clothes, etc. I find myself praying for me to be happy with what He has bessed me with. And what He has given me is unbelievable…I will continue to pray about this one.
Smiles & Blessings,
Robin
I so appreciate your post for today. I am in a study group right now dealing with insecurities. This post so goes along with it. I do think that I am one of those that gets so involved in the thoughts of someone else’s (others’) blessings and in doing so I forget to notice the blessings that all around me and instead have feelings of jealousy and discontentment. Thank you for the reminder or the nudge to remember how God has so blessed me and my life.
I have Christian ‘friends’ on facebook who seem to love to big themselves up. Their comments on their wonderful family etc etc annoy me – so I ‘block’ their newsfeed from my facebook page and don’t click through when they comment on others’ news while I deal with my ugly attitude. A ‘facebook fast’ in this way, while requiring discipline, really helps me.
I definitely think media can effect the way we list our gifts. I so needed your P31 devotional today where you quoted Elisabeth Elliot & said we should change our prayer from “get me outa here!” To “what can I learn from this?” Currently our family is in the midst of a difficult situation, & it is so easy to think “Lord, please, give us a new place to serve you!” But He has taught us so much this year and brought us closer to himself. My husband & I have a much stronger relationship because of it! No matter how difficult the circumstance- there is always something to thank Him for! Please, pray for us to not rush ahead of God, but that we will trust His grace is sufficient. Thank you Karen!
I am currently striving to take up the joy dare, actively looking for graces, gifts, and blessings in my life. If I fail to look for God’s goodness, I miss so much of it, and it is so very easy to dwell on the “things” other people seem to have. I have also found that much of the ungratefulness and discontentment in my own life surfaces when I think that I deserve something better than what God in His goodness has provided. Yes, the Joneses are lauded and paraded, and it can make my efforts more difficult, but as long ad my heart is right toward God, the struggle is easily overcome with His love for me.
Great post! Love the title! Boy, do we ever live in a “keeping up with the Joneses” world?! I personally do not do Facebook, twitter, or any real social media of the sort. I browse Pinterest every so often but quickly get disgusted so it doesn’t last too long. I cannot for the life of me understand why other people think anyone is interested in what they are “cooking for dinner!” It goes way beyond just chatting with your girlfriends casually for some dinner ideas. When has our society gotten so completely obsessed with the “see me now” attitudes? I cannot stand it! Can you tell I kinda feel strongly about this issue? Ha! This is only the second time I have ever posted a comment on a blog but when this was the topic…I had to!! There are aspects to social media that are great. The fact that I was able to read your post and realize there are people out there that might share a similar viewpoint as myself is wonderful. I homeschool and read many homeschool blogs. I am subscribed to Proverbs 31 as well as other great daily messages, but Facebook and all that, no way! Not necessary for my life or my family! We all survived without it before and I believe I am not missing a thing! Isn’t it obvious our lives could be a bit easier, a bit less messy, a bit less discontent without constantly looking into others lives? It’s exactly as your post says, the comparisons are overrated! It’s not reality! Oh well, I’ll stop now. Thanks for the giveaway opportunity!
Thanks for sharing! I totally can relate! : )
We are media saturated and our children, our friends, we are being saturated by what Hollywood sees as needed, wanted, should be desired by all, we see their version the the “got to haves”. It makes raising children so very difficult because even in our “christian” school 4th graders are getting Iphones and I-touch for Christmas – WHY? i really don’t get it but it is a constant battle and a tiring one. We are trying to teach our children to be content with what they have and more importantly to be grateful for what they have which is so much!!!!!!!
Thanks for your encouragement.
Blessings,
kareng
I’ve found that staying away from the mall and not looking at the Sunday paper ads help me with my contentment. If I don’t see what’s out there, I don’t think I “need” it.
Contentment is a constant battle in our culture! Being satisfied with what we have and our current season of life can be a real challenge! The many forms of media overloads us with the idea that our happiness and contentment rest on having and doing it all! As an adult and parent it can be extremely difficult being thankful for what we have when we are surrounded by people who feel the need to overshare their good fortune. Jealousy can rear it’s ugly head all too often! We must train ourselves to be content and not think that the quality of our lives is measured by having or doing what the Jeoneses do! The real challenge is teaching this discipline to our children! God can equip us!
Thanks Karen for the devotional and the reminder! : )
Karen, thank you for this paragraph in today’s devotion:
To truly embrace our circumstances, we must decide to stop pleading, “God, get me out of here!” and learn to humbly ask instead, “Lord, why have You brought me here? What are You trying to reveal to me that I would never discover if You were to suddenly pluck me out of this situation? What godly character qualities are You trying to grow in me? Patience? Trust? Faith? Compassion?”
I am stuck with the ‘get me out of here cry’ and with this prayer I am going to work to turn my mind to asking the Lord ‘why have you brought me here?’ and ‘what do you want me to learn?’
<3 Dorothy
Yes I struggle with contentment and the “if only’s” as I compare myself to others. Thankfully we serve a God who loves us and is reminding me that He made me in His image to do what He has called me to do! Thanks Karen for sharing your heart, for your honesty and your love for Jesus.
I have very crafty friends who can craft & bake. I am so basic. My child’s bday party was at a waterpark with no games planned (she’s not into party games). My friend’s kid parties have a theme, party games, amazing decorations & fancy cupcakes.
I’ve been a mom for almost 21yrs. I stopped keeping with the Joneses a long time ago. There is no competing. I just do what is right for my family.
Oh my…isn’t it funny how when you really need a word from God specifically about what you are trying to deal with…in comes a devotional about it. Karen, your devotional today was really helpful and help me to ask God how to help me in my particular situation. I’m not going to compare our relationship to those of other couples. I’ll trust God to tell me what to do (and to for Him to tell my Fiance what he needs to do). It’s so hard.
I had mentioned on my facebook page that I’m engaged. My fiance wanted me to move much quicker than what I had planned and it really seemed like my path just led to that. He was afraid I’d meet another man and he’d be devastated. During that time, odd things that I hadn’t had happen to me in and outside of work happened and voila: perfect timing for a move.
However, right now I’m seeing odd behavior from my fiance and i’m trying not to cry but it’s hard…and I’m asking myself when it’s pretty clear that God made a path for me to move faster to be closer to my fiance, why has He put me here? I don’t need heartache…what am I supposed to be here for? Am I supposed to help my fiance with stuff he’s going through? Am I supposed to learn or refine a godly characteristic? what? you know?
I’m not on facebook much because I’m honestly not sure what to write and I thought this was the man God had chosen for me. maybe he is. Right now though it’s like a bad infomercial that has misrepresentation written all over it. I won’t go into details but I feel like I’ve been had and it’s hard to “let it go” when you just want to tell that man to get his act together and return to treating me like a fiance and not less than a fiance, you know? I’m seeing I’ve been lied to about a few things and his behavior is changing….not fun at all. Thank you for the devotional.
Last year I was engaged to a man I had dated for 2 years prior. We were compatible people and he would go to church with me as long as we were out before the football games came on. We served in Children’s ministry together and I thought he was just as plugged in as I was. But 1 1/2 months before our wedding he stopped going altogether and told me I would have to go alone. When I got to the bottom of it he said he wasn’t actually a Christian, he was a Deist, and that would just have to do with us. It was like I had been tricked into committing my life to someone. I had just signed a lease to a place I couldn’t afford on my own, I didn’t have a job at the time, and no other options. I prayed for God to calm my fears and speak his will for my life more clearly- should I succumb to an unequally yoked marriage, or should I stand up for my faith and leave? The answer became very clear. I was supposed to leave. I let him know and he was out within 5 days. Day 7 I was offered a job, day 9 I had a new roommate who paid for the entire summer up front. day 39 I went on a date and met the man who is now my fiance. We work together in a children’s ministry that he served on prior to meeting me and we are praying where God will take us as he finishes his nursing degree and pursues nurse practicioning school.
Julie, I pray that in the midst of your struggle that you lean on your saviour. The only one who will provide the comfort you seek. If you would like to talk more you can reach me at kayla.kearns@siu.edu and I will do my best to offer more support from my personal experiences. I would suggest that you find a church in your new location and talk to a female there you can trust. It’s always helpful to have a friend closeby to call on when you need prayer.
Hi Kayla, thank you so much for the support. I will email you and yes, that is a good idea on my new local church.
Everyone needs a media detox every now and then. I find that most often when i am not focused on God, my mind strays. Its those days when a ride to the country, some time alone, a nice bubble bath, a cup of tea, or even a good book can help more than anything.
I learned a lot about keeping up with the Jones family while watching my mother succumb to the pressures. My friends all referred to her as “Martha Stewart” and would say, “I wish my mom was more like your mom.” She made sure we kept up with the latest trends, got to go out and participate in social activities, clubs, athletics, all while working full time, keeping an emmaculate home and having a homemade dinner on the table every night for dinner. My mom was very emotional when others weren’t around, she would let her stress build and build until she’d cry hysterically over a mismatched placemat at the dinner table; but never in front of the company. It wasn’t until I was out of high school that I ever knew we struggled with money, or that my mom had high blood pressure and drank regularly.
Now I am pregnant with my first child, due in September, and I am concerned that I will succumb to the pressure to be “super mom” like my mom needed to be. I think this book will provide valuable tools for my beginning parenthood and look forward to reading it.
Contentment and Comparison, both words that go hand in hand. I find that when I am comparing myself to someone else, discontentment soon follows. Also, being a perfectionist, which I am, can be mentally and physically exhausting.
I love the statement about discontentment comes from counting someone else’s blessings and not your own. How true this is!
Overall I do believe I am a pretty content person. Material things are not important to me, I can’t take them with me to Heaven. Vacations should be about what you and your family enjoys. Just because others are going on a cruise or to Disney does not mean it is what we need to do. My family loves camping and hunting and the great outdoors, those kind of vacations appeal to us and work within our budget. However, I do find it a challenge to teach this to our children. They see other kids with things they think they have to have…like cell phones or Ipads and it makes it hard. So we work through it and in the end it always seems to work out if we use God as our focus.
I think for the most part i am content with my small apartment. I don’t need a fancy car, expensive vacation or shopping spree, or pretty jewels to make me happy. I struggle with wanting more than one good pair of jeans like maybe having 2 good pair. I struggle with wanting to replace my only 2 three year old, too small, worn out bras with 2 new ones or maybe even 3! Is that being discontent? I don’t have an extra penny due to being on disability and it seems that this is just the way its going to be. I will never be able to afford socks, underwear etc. Am i being discontent by wishing for those things? I don’t know. I mean it would be nice to have the necessities of life. Seriously i am trying to be content with my lot in life because i don’t think its going to change anytime soon. So when i look at this question…
What do you think of this statement: discontentment comes from counting someone else’s blessings instead of your own? When i see the the new dress they are wearing, the new fancy hair do, the steaks, roast and expensive groceries they put in their cart and i can’t even afford a lb. of ground turkey or 1 new bra let alone 2 0r 3 it does tend to make me discontent, dissatisfied and jealous for a short time. However i’m not usually one for pity parties though so i don’t let myself dwell there. I have a warm apartment, food, a car that runs and clothes to wear among many other blessings and when i think of that then it’s really not so bad. Thanks for this today. It is another one i will print and keep for future reference.
I have to say that I do find my self full of discontentment when it comes to my appearance. I am not one to really wish for things others have. But I do get to thinking man I wish I could eat like her and not struggle with weight or why can’t I be like my husband and cut very little out of my diet and lose 12 in a month!
As far as a social media fast…..that might not be a bad idea!!!
Contentment- that one hit me in the face a few years back. My sister-in-law had a great house, in a local that I liked, near some of my friends, etc, and I wanted it! I hated going to visit because I left feeling less of a person and that what I do in life didn’t compare. Several times I cried as we left, just wishing for a portion of what she had. Then one time I tried to started looking at what I had that she didn’t. Maybe I didn’t have lots of indoor space to host family gatherings, but I had LOTS of outdoor space for my family to roam. I could hang out my laundry on the line- her housing group didn’t permit clotheslines (how crazy to buy a house for the neighbors to tell you how you can live?!?) And I found that if I looked at what I had rather than what I didn’t have, it made the visits much more enjoyable
Contentment is a daily struggle for me. I would love to read this book and put a stop to this nasty habit. We have a comfortable home an have lived in it for 32 years. I hate to admit, I am not content…..would like a newer home with high ceilings, granite counter tops, no cracks in the wall, etc… help please.
Taking a 40 day fast from the mall or internet has helped me focus of what i have been given. As Paul writes he has contentment with a little or a lot. I need the reflection time to let the Lord work these words into my heart.
I fortunately rarely struggle with comparison, I guess a gift God has given me, not that I don’t have other issues! LOL
I am afraid I struggle daily with contentment and thinking I am not good enough. I am overweight and have begun to feel that I am not good enough. Not a good enough wife. mom, daughter, sister, friend. I get overwhelmed at times when I read Facebook thinking how does he/she do that? How can you be perfect all the time? I am participating in the Let.It.Go OSB Bible study and I am praying and hoping that by the end of the study that I can Let.It.Go.
I feel contentment is sometimes a daily struggle…especially in todays world! (FB, Pinterest, etc.) Definitely need to work on being more thankful for MY blessings!
I poured my heart out to some HAH friends about my struggle with this issue and one of them directed me over here to read about the Jones family. (-:
I do not want to be this discontent person.
I want to be free of this.
I want to breathe life into my family that isn’t tainted with discontentment…because I feel we are all struggling a bit.